So my best friend/cousin is down in Florida visiting her mom and dad. She took her daughter, son, and son’s girlfriend. I have heard over the last year that M and Z are a trip to be around when they are together. I’m not talking about in a good way, more like an annoying way. M is 17 years old and has been dating Z for a year in a half. Miss Z is VERY jealous, clingy, wants M to spend all his time with her and when they aren’t together she is constantly texting him asking him what is he doing, who’s at the house, etc. M and his brother J were playing an xbox game and Z started crying because M was having more fun with J than her……WHAT?!?!?!
So my cousin R warned M that the fighting, crying, jealous crap better not happen while they were on vacation. M promised it wouldn’t happen. Yea I have had to calm R down 4 different times in the past 3 days. R was telling me that her dad made a bon fire outside and that Z dragged M in the house because she was bored and didn’t want to be out there. R’s brother RJ came over with his girlfriend and her daughter. Z got upset because the RJ’s girl had a dress on and Z said she looks slutty. She didn’t want M looking at her, M kept looking in the other direction, RJ is trying to talk to his nephew and M wasn’t looking at him because his girl was next to him and Z was getting upset. Seriously? Then Z and M were fighting again and R’s dad heard Z tell M he needs to walk away from his mom and dad when they try to talk to him about his relationship to her.
R then tells me that M and Z are in “couples” counseling at school. WHAT?!?!?! I guess the counselor agrees with M most of the time because Z’s behavior is……weird. This poor girl has some major insecurity issues. M doesn’t smile, isn’t his outgoing goofy self, he doesn’t hang with his friends. I told R maybe she needs to let the school counselor know what happened and maybe she has some ideas how to handle it. R doesn’t want Z at the house anymore. Z was out of line quite a few times. R told Z, M is in Florida to see his family not hang out with her. M also has a friend that is in Florida and the friend doesn’t like Z at all. The friend is on R’s facebook and Z got totally upset saying that it is disrespectful to her that R has the friend on her facebook and R should delete him and apologize. OMG that is insane.
I am getting upset along with R. She has tried to talk to M to tell him he needs to put a stop to the behavior because it will never change if he allows her to act that way. Oh have mercy!!! There have been many different people that have told M how crazy this relationship is.
Is it a self esteem thing? How many people do you know that turn a blind eye because they love the person even though friends and family tell them otherwise. Then after awhile they see exactly what the other people were saying. I hope when my kids are dating that they make good choices for a partner and recognize the red flags. I have already told my kids if one of their mates isn’t acting right I will say something, they can get mad all they want. I know I would do it in a respectful way and not make the situation worse. However, if it comes down to it is it a good thing to have a brother come to his sister’s defense to remind the boy to have manners?
I have tried to teach my children to teach people with respect not be jealous, etc. I would be upset if my child behaved like Z has!!! Then they would get in trouble for worrying me LOL I don’t want any gray hairs or wrinkles. I always joke with my girls to not get so upset about small stuff, it causes wrinkles. It gets them to think about whether a situation is really that big of a deal to have a wrinkle :).
If I am having to take some deep breaths with M and Z how am I going to be with my own? Have mercy!!!