It’s Friday!!! :)

I didn’t get much sleep last night 😦 the wind was making the blinds move a lot so that was noisy, then I was hot, plus I wasn’t too happy with hubby so that doesn’t make for a good nights rest. I have to work late today so I’m hoping I won’t be tired. I plan on walking during my lunch. A monster coffee sounds really yummy about now especially over a bunch of ice. Did I mention before my oldest daughter is moving back home? Well she is and I can’t wait!!! She is trying to transfer to a store that is here, I’m sure hoping and praying she is able too. That will make things a ton easier for us all. The girls are complaining that they have to share a room, they feel they are too old for that. Seriously? Really? Neither one of them can share with their brother especially now that he is going through puberty so suck it up girls LOL :). My best friend is also moving back from Florida. I’m excited because I would love to be able to go out with her and have girl time. She is a nut to say the least!

 

I’m really struggling hard with my hubby. I find anger, frustration, and even hurt keep building. I don’t know what to do anymore. I know the issues he’s dealing with are going to take time but yet I can’t shake the feeling that maybe he really doesn’t want us? I’ve always been one to say Actions speak louder than words and I’m just not seeing any action. It’s pretty sad when you put more time and effort into fantasy football than you do your own marriage. I used to try to be the one to initiate but I’m just plum tired of carrying a relationship. I was asked by my friend if I felt safe with H? I said no

Would he ever hit me, uh no, not if he’s smart! From reading about this addiction it’s very normal for the spouse to not feel safe. I’ve felt that way for so long I want and need more. I’m trying to be supportive, he says he’s trying and I want to say how? going to a counselor once every two weeks? What about meetings? what about caring for your health? what about a lot of things. I see NOTHING from him but waking up, maybe doing some dishes……………Oh I’m going to stop right now. I need to just have a pity party for a bit and then go on. However the thing that keeps coming up is I need more. I’m lonely, hell I want a better sex life!

Gotta finish getting ready for work. Just needed to vent….thanks

Be blessed today

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