I can’t believe it’s Sunday afternoon already!! There are days I wish there were two of me, I’m sure the family would argue that ;). For my baby girl’s birthday coming up we went shopping for a few outfits. As she was coming out of the dressing room I couldn’t help but stare at her. I’m saying the weekends go by so fast but the past 22 years have really flown. I remember when each of my children were born like it was yesterday and yet they are 22, 15, and 12. I still think of myself as 21 how can my oldest be 22 lol? I’m very proud of my babies to say the least!!!
I started reading Dr. Phil’s Family Matters book last night. I love to read, I buy books and at times I don’t get to them right away or a few years. I was reading chapter on parenting getting divorce and how they are never divorced from parenting. I wish my ex would read that part!! We were the best of friends when we got divorced despite the fast he left me for another woman. Once he and that woman moved around to where the kids and I lived he changed ALOT. He didn’t co parent with me, he used the kids to relay messages, wouldn’t return phone calls, etc It really is sad. The only one he hurt were our daughters. I always tried to do the right thing, really I did. I didn’t care that he left and was with the homewrecker. What I cared about was the her always bad mouthing me! My dog had to have surgery to have cancer removed and after consulting with the vet, I decided to take the dog off commercial dog food, I cooked for him and gave him organic food that had no grains in it. When the girls came home one time from their dad’s, one daughter asked if giving the dog people food was healthy and I told her yes then she proceeded to tell me the home wrecker said it was bad for dogs. I told my daughter last time I checked home wrecker wasn’t a vet and I will do what the vet and I talked about. So of course when they go back to their dad’s guess what is said….yup, mom said you’re not a vet and she is doing what the vet said. So it was stupid things like that that started happening. Or this one time (pretty funny) I was cooking dinner, oldest was on the phone with her dad, I went downstairs to get the laundry and when I got back upstairs, dinner was a bit burnt, so I peeked my head in my daughter’s room to ask if she could call her dad back real quick because I wanted to order pizza since I just burnt dinner. Then I hear her cry/whining “she’s not”. Then she said it again, I asked her what’s wrong? She said dad things you’re filling my head with crap so he said tell your mom to stop filling your head with crap and leave the room. I busted out laughing and said loud enough for him to hear, all I said was can you call him back in 3 minutes so I can order pizza because I burnt dinner. Geez I’m not filling your head full of crap but I almost did your stomach.
Now I know that wasn’t the right thing to say either but I wanted her to lighten up. Which did put the focus on me burning dinner, I have to say in my many years of cooking I’ve only burnt dinner a few times and that was because I got side tracked 🙂 It was petty really. I had the girls and I in counseling because they had a lot of emotions going on and frankly I wanted to be a better parent. I didn’t care if my ex liked me or not, even if he had no reason I didn’t do anything to him. I guess he forgot he had known me since I was 11 years old and knew I wasn’t the type of person to talk crap about him to his girls. Now I sure did tell him mom when he didn’t show up for conferences, band concerts, etc and that wasn’t talking bad about him I would say how hurt the oldest was he didn’t show up. I kept him informed of everything. Heck when he left I made up a photo album of the girls from the time they were babies until he left so that way he had some too.
It breaks my heart that the girls had to go through it. I remarried and my husband never said a negative thing about my ex. Heck I shut my mouth even about the ex’s wife even when she was trying to turn the youngest daughter against me. For someone who doesn’t know me she sure acted like she did. The amazing thing is she just left my ex a few months ago for another man and has started divorce proceedings. It really is true, what goes around comes around.
So I did my best to take the high road and I know it will pay off but I hope the hurt they have gone through won’t leave scars that don’t fade.
I am always telling my friends that have gotten divorced to hush their mouths around the kids. I don’t want to see any child under such emotional stress. I remember what it was like after my parents divorce and my mom started dating this guy. I hated him and his family, I over heard the guy’s mom bad mouth my mom quite a few times (mom wasn’t there). The last thing I want is to have the government in my business but yet at the same time there should be something done when one parent is acting like a complete boob because they have ill feelings for the other parent. It’s damaging to the kids period and they shouldn’t be subjected to that.
Ooook let’s get off that subject. There were many times I reminded myself Jesus slept on the boat during a nasty storm, and if he can sleep through it I can make it too.
I really should be doing my lesson plans for the rest of the month and then making playdough. This months color is purple (my favorite) so I’ll have fun with that. It’s amazing how play dough will keep a 3 year old busy for an hour. I have 14 3 year olds in my preschool class, I love every last one of them!!! I love my job to say the least.
Oh goodness I also need to throw the roast in the oven, I really better get off of here. ta ta for now 🙂